I must be too annoying 4 u.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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