Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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