Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize