the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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