He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
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Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
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you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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