to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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