i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
