DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
