I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
