Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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