Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
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