Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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