At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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