u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I just googled if crying burns calories
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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