I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
bring money and cleavage
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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