I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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