We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
