There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
