I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
