this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
