he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
