So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
