Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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