either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
