Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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