Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
