You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
