Whod you bang
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
