At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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