i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
