I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
