the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize