I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
