maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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