the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize