so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
3pm strippers are depressing
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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