I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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