I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
