i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
