you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
