DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
