You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
