Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Randomize
