If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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