I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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