She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize