I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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