what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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