I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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