Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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