i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
