please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
