I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
